Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Dear Mimi


How do you handle being in an interracial relationship publicly?
Well I've been in an interracial relationship for 4 years and before that none of my other boyfriends have ever been the same race as me. It really shouldn't be a big deal but for some people it is. Race has never really bothered me because my family is Creole and we have so many different shades and colors between all of us.

I used to get so much flack for it though. I remember when I was in high school, this guy asked me out. I just wasn't interested in him. He then went off on me about how I was racist. My teacher actually had to stop class and we had a debate on the situation. Who you wish to date is just personal preference. I personally like all guys from skinny white guys like Adam Brody, beefcake caramel men like Vin diesel, to sexy deep chocolate Morris Chestnut. And underage Hispanic jailbait like Taylor Lautner. Just cause I like white guys too doesn’t mean I don't like any other guy or that I'm racist. Hell, if Tyrese walked up to me right now that would be a wrap. Sorry boyfriend.

You won’t only get flack from your own race. I cannot even tell you how many times white girls have come up to me saying stuff like I shouldn’t be with my man and that he should be with them instead. Well guess what? It’s been 4 years and he hasn't gone anywhere. This goes for all races. Love doesn’t see color and just cause you’re part of one race doesn't mean you have to feel limited to dating and befriending only them.

Basically, you just have to do you. As long as you're secure in your relationship that is all that matters. If someone doesn't like it I really don't care. As you can probably tell, I have no issue with saying who is attractive to me. I'll go on and on about it and rub it in their faces. If they don't like it they don't have to associate with me. If that’s not your style, all you can do is ignore them and live your life because its YOUR life. Then it will just rub salt in their wounds when they see that you’re happy and they’re not.

14 tastes:

Marie85 said...

I really don't see what is wrong with dating someone outside your race and in all honesty I could care less. I've dated guys outside my race and I got flack for it and I'm getting flack for it now because my bf is a Russian but I swear he confuses me because he's so hood but I love him just the way he is. If Seal and Hiedi Klum, Kimmora and the other guy I really can't pronounce or spell his name, but if they can be together and not get flack for it why can't I date who ever the hell I wanna date. Get a grip people and a life damnit. We're in a new millenium this generation is evolving. I understand too that you wanna keep the fruits of the family one way but who a person chooses to date is there issue and if you wanna exile them that's on you but I bet if they become successful in anyway you'll be all over the couples asses.

Marie85 said...

Did I mention I love this blog, OMG.

Sharles said...

Oh Muffins. You know I've never had an intra-racial relationship, ever. I've never even seen a boy of my race naked- except babies. I dated a black boy, a hispanic boy, no Asians, lots of white kids, no Indians, Arabs, or anyone from the Asian continent (Where I'm from). My Dad saw Heidi and Seal together and he's just like "She's only doing it because it's in style." I just wanted to say, "Well, did you consider that he is a handsome man, good father, and amazing husband? Perhaps she loves him?" He's one of those people that thinks you belong with your own race. He doesn't understand that this kind of thinking would have kept people of my color down, without any rights, and we wouldn't have the same opportunities as white people. I'm sorry, if you don't accept interracial relationships, you support the abomination that is "Separate but Equal." We were not meant to be separated. Only crazies separate their M&Ms by color. This is a touchy subject for me. Sexy is sexy is sexy, no matter what color it is. Delicious is delicious is delicious no matter what country it's from. A good fuck is a good fuck is a good fuck, no matter what religion. Our bodies and libidos and hearts don't know the difference between black white or middle eastern, and that is the power of attraction- God love us horny people for it.

Marie85 said...

CHUUURRCCCCHHH! The unfortunate thing about it is that all races have that thinking, but you have a few who really don't care or have a problem, but you're right only crazies separate their M&M's....I think it's time we taste the rainbow bitches! I think dating someone outside your race is cool because for me I see as a cultural experience. I get to learn about the culture and adapt to some things from the culture. I haven't dated an Asian, or an Arab, I've dated West Indians ( Koolie as we call them), but theire are some sexy ones out there, and whenever I see one I always say the Lords prayer, lol. Seriously though, you are right in what you posted, so I agree with you 100%.

Sharles said...

:) Yay! Nice to see the world is evolving.

Cristina. said...

i didnt know people still tripped on it. ive always been surrounded by it even im in one :)

Hollywood said...

I love being in an interracial relationship...And I can't wait to have some adorable mixed kids with him <3

Marie85 said...

That's exactly how I feel about the person I'm with. Matter a fact he wants to have kids badly cause honestly speaking I had my doubts but I said to hell with who has a problem with it my first kid is Puerto Rican and Black, so why can't we have kids that are Russian and Black. It's a beautiful thing having mixed kids. I get the slack from my people's and they seem to forget that their parents are mixed, only person I don't get slack from is my Grandmother cause she's a mixed person. Shit we're all mixed babies we just need to do some research and we would be surprised. Power to the inter-racial kids, and relationships.

Yarayuki said...

*snap snap*

I get down with brown, green, yellow or fuchsia. You lookin' good and we're one the same wavelength, why not?

I'm proud to say my boyfriend is Chinese. And I'd be just as proud to say if he were Black or White or anything in between. And it's because he's a good, hard working honest man who I am fortunate enough to have found and allowed myself to open up to. And that's that :-) And the people who have negativity to spew can watch me continue on shaking my ass with my man latched onto my arm as we merrily skip away. No time for hate. Only love!

Marie85 said...

CHURCH, Tabernacle...I agree. This is a really good topic.

Unknown said...

WOW how did i miss this post?!? i completellllly agree. i am into someone that is white... and i know we will be together at some point.. but i can only imagine how much people will hate to see us together... but no worries! I will show him off lol.. people need to realize what year it is.

s said...

Nice post, and I agree - it's all about being secure. I'm dating a white guy (I'm Asian), and I HATE the flack we always get about, "oh another white guy and asian girl"... it's like, did anyone stop to think that we date the people we date because we like them for something OTHER than their damn skin tone?!? lol.

I was about to post a rant of my own on the stigma attached to meeting a significant other online - which is how I met my boyfriend...

And the girl up there who said she wants cute mixed babied - DUDE I am SO with you on that :p

Tulip said...

I agree...good entry. I'm Black and my new hubby is White. If they don't like seeing people who don't have the same skin color together, well, that's their problem. They shouldn't try to make it mine. We've been in a relationship for 8 1/2 years now, lol...neither of us is going anywhere. People should get over it and mind their own business.

By the way, you rock. I looove your blog. You're a girl after my own heart...just bolder about it than I am. Keep it up. You're a blast.

Tulip said...

By the way, I've never dated a Black man either.